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What It’s Really Like to Date As a High-Earning Woman

My dating life has changed a lot since I launched Her First $100K. What started as a side hustle is now a seven-figure business. If you Google my name, you’ll learn what I do for work, where I grew up, and that my company made more than $3.4 million in 2021. I’m proud of my accomplishments, but it’s kind of weird that a potential date can know personal details about my life before we even meet face-to-face.

The reality is high-earning women are often perceived differently in the eyes of people they date. My success can be intimidating or even threatening to potential partners. This puts me in a unique position when it comes to dating. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like dating as a high earning woman, then you’ve come to the right place.

Get a Different Take: I’m a Female Breadwinner: Here’s How It’s Impacted My Marriage

1. I get recognized on dates.

This is obviously unique to being in the public eye. There are plenty of high-earning women who don’t get recognized, but there are also many business women like me who do have a public persona.

I have been recognized by strangers or HFK community members on multiple dates I’ve been on, which is very interesting to me. I am only just fully understanding that this is part of my life now. To have that happen on a date is a little crazy but also a kind of subtle flex. It’s kind of fun but also very weird.

2. I will likely out-earn my future partner.

I’m fully aware now with the success of my business and my financial independence that most of the men I will date and meet will earn less than I do. I will out-earn most of the men I meet, and I am most likely to out-earn any future partner, which I think is incredibly powerful.

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3. It weeds out duds.

Frankly, the men who would be intimidated by my earnings are the men I don’t want to date and have no interest in. I think it’s actually a really impressive statement to be able to say “I am choosing to date you and choosing to be with you because I like you and want to be around you. I’m not interested in you for any financial stability that you could provide me.”

That’s freeing and one of the reasons why I fight for women to have financial freedom. No one should be bound to someone purely for survival.

4. I am extra cautious.

On the flip side of that, I am now very wary about dating people because they could potentially take advantage of me. That’s also a little scary and something I have to constantly look out for. I would hate to fall for someone who has ulterior motives for wanting to be with me. That would be a terrible situation.

5. Potential partners are attracted to my success.

The vast majority of men who I have been interested in have been supportive of my business and supportive of my life and find it very exciting. I think it’s one of the biggest things that actually attracts them to me. And again, the men who are intimidated or feel weird about my business are not the ones that I want to date anyway.

Ready to put your earnings to work? You can use online financial tools to get a better handle on your money. My favorite tool is Personal Capital. I check it daily for tracking my net worth and my progress towards goals like retirement, debt payoff, and (yes!) saving that first $100k.

Get Started with Personal Capital’s Free Financial Tools

 

 

Personal Capital compensates Tori Dunlap of Her First $100k (“Author”) for providing the content contained in this article. Compensation not to exceed $500. Author is not a client of Personal Capital Advisors Corporation. Additionally, in a separate referral arrangement between Author and Personal Capital Corporation (“PCC”), Author is paid $70 and $150 for each person who uses Author’s webpage (www.HerFirst100k.com) to register with Personal Capital and links at least $100,000 in investable assets to Personal Capital’s Free Financial Dashboard. As a result of these arrangements, Author may financially benefit from referring potential clients to Personal Capital and/or be incentivized to present blog content that is favorable to PCC. No fees or other amounts will be charged to investors by Author or Personal Capital as a result of the Referral Arrangement. Investors that are referred to PCC and subsequently subscribe for investment advisory services provided by PCC’s affiliated adviser, Personal Capital Advisors Corporation (“PCAC”) will not pay increased management fees or other similar compensation to Author, PCC or PCAC as a result of this arrangement. The content contained in this blog post is intended for general informational purposes only and is not meant to constitute legal, tax, accounting or investment advice. You should consult a qualified legal or tax professional regarding your specific situation. Keep in mind that investing involves risk. The value of your investment will fluctuate over time and you may gain or lose money.

Tori Dunlap is a millennial money and career expert. After saving $100,000 at age 25, Tori founded Her First $100K to fight financial inequality by giving women actionable resources to better their money. A Plutus award winner, her work has been featured on Good Morning America, New York Magazine, Forbes, CNBC, and more. An honors graduate of the University of Portland, Tori currently lives in Seattle, where she enjoys eating fried chicken, going to barre classes, and attempting to naturally work John Mulaney bits into conversation.
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